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Wrestling Is Real, People Are Fake

by Mega Ran

  • Digital Album
    Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    hand crafted sleeves, signed by Mega Ran, with artwork by Notz.

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  • Other Apparel + Digital Album

    Designed by Clay Graham, limited to 50 pcs

    Includes unlimited streaming of Wrestling Is Real, People Are Fake via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Wrestling Is Real T-Shirt
    T-Shirt/Shirt + Digital Album

    design by Aaron Hill of Bits and Rhymes. 100% cotton tees shipping now.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Wrestling Is Real, People Are Fake via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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yo - it's still real to me dammit! you haters just knocking it cause you don't understand it Hot shotting belts in a last second panic We on long term booking, feet planted, I don’t vanish They want me to fall back, make room for the others, But naw, I’m sorry– that ain't gone work for me brother the work that we produce Make a listener go Damn! like he working with Farooq Get you worked into a shoot I’m the, Shawn Michaels of the song cycle, The Paul Bearer of the small era, The new face of terror, Toss you off a cage in a fit of rage make Foley look like Like Steve-O and Margera They wondering if Mat Mania done hit the bricks, We like Terry Funk, homie, we ain’t never gonna quit Pop up unexpectedly, perpetual motion Jeff Jarrett - getting a bag from every promotion Quizzlemania, to Wrestle with Wregret Up Up Down Down then to Dynamite with Wes I dont wanna upset my political connects But i was watching wrestling on a black and white set Scramble box in the living room aince mania 1 And watched ECW since the day it begun Back on 23rd and Swanson in tattered denim jackets Swinging like Cornette with tennis rackets Smile into the hard cam get used to the pressure none fresher, leaving amateurs future endeavored… Raps about wrestling? thought you’d never see the day Turned it up to 11 like Kurt angle in TNA Asking dumb questions, is he face or a heel? Put rappers in the hammerlocks, till making em squeal Told record labels to chill, cuz I ain’t taking the deal Cause i Never gonna die like Bret’s hatred for bill Accidents happen but this was on purpose, Lenny Poffo, im a genius when spitting these verses Wrestling mag under the seat when im sitting in service Free agent cause my soul isn’t for purchase Listen I been rowdy, from Philly to cobb county King Booker i don’t need nobody to crown me Oh Mega! Leave em triggered like a knee to the face Cause wrestling is real and People are fake what
Teek Hall Nightmare? More like a night terror Undertaker all i need is a Paul Bearer Sneaker app era, sold out by bots I got the plug on the block He pull up pop the trunk Everything that wasn’t there in stock If you opt for this service its gonna cost a lot But since i’m the champ my taste is top notch Whether a belt or a strap The recipient of that championship is black If it’s 24/7 I can never lack I’m always on go Fresh head to toe like we shooting a video And spitting these bars like I’m cutting a promo You will never get these kicks if you slow bro Trying to catch em all like a Pokeom Eating ramen at the Ichiban Wrestling belts the type of sh*t we on So we could never kick it with you peons Toure Masters Strapped like Air Forces high top whites Two belts like Roman on a Friday night Match the leather with my attitude Air ones that’ll do Great like blue in the stu with the crew SB necessities always travel with Tiffany’s Cant be gone too long the game stay missing me Oregon fours different green Sneaker change, different scene Put my feet first cause my sneakers really worth a ton of cream It’s strap season really bout that season Fearless fives outside they be like “he tweaking” I’m ric flair cause I reign the most when i shine I’m supposed to outrhyme the GOATs of past time I got it smooth from the belt to the shoes They gotta mean something cause you can’t keep it when you lose And if they nice I’ll for sure wear em twice Spin around kicks like trouble in paradise It’s a new day Mega Ran I’m over here just sitting back maxing Back with lost perception every single track slapping Opener or main event I get the best match In Spamming super kicks like I’m nick and Matt Jackson No velcro, every button snapped coordinated so the belt and the kicks gotta match When you got it like that you ain’t refreshing on an App It’s what I’m referring to when I be like get the strap If you know then you know Before the bucks was in Diors Shane was in cement 3s Back bumpin on the floor You just under ran, copying like cover bands While I’m Casket fresh like ‘Taker up at Summerslam No Kama, godfather to these babies Killing the territory like Vince did in the 80s It’s a lifestyle I’ll forever represent it But if you rocking a belt, i expect you to defend it What’s up
Ayo I’ve seen what you do, I respect it and all I been watching Wrestling since before I could even crawl So I think the next logical step to progress is to hop inside the ring Give my knowledge a test, yes... Luckily I’ve got a friend named Creed He’s agreed to show me everything Im gonna need So excuse me I’ma do a couple stretches And then we can get started with these lessons Wait, Ran, what are you doing? Is this why I’m here? And why are you in a singlet (this is my wrestling gear) I thought I was coming over to play monster hunter (Yeah I tried to tell you plans changed, but I Lost your number) (Yo remember that time We did that battle in the ring) yeah And everybody loved it and said we did our thing?) Yeah, but that was like 2 years ago (yeah I know, but I think I wanna give this a go, bro no. There so many things you need to aware of the fans, co-workers, yourself to take care of! The respect, ability to connect And Not mention you could break your freaking neck ( Like Kurt angle did?) yeah, exactly take a back seat, That guy, he’s an Olympic athlete So imagine what would happen to you What’s the worst thing, really? Well, you could tear your Achilles… I wanna slam fools on the mat Wanna suplex, cats give em Belly to Backs Rock Bottom, Tombstone and sunset flip So I need you to teach me that I wanna slam fools on the mat Hear the crowd go wild when I win the strap Moonsault, Sharpshooter and a F5 too So I need you to teach me that V2 Like, just because you’re a fan you think you can hop in the ring, like straight out the stands? (Yeah) Like, what if I just decided to rap? (Like you’re doing right now), well that’s besides the fact I’m only doing this to prove my point, And for the record I sound pretty good on this joint. But First of all, no shade, but you’re of a certain age, And the body reacts different to pain When’s the last time you fell, (well, actually a week ago When I got clumsy in a Home Depot, so?) Imagine doing that 30 times a day And some ailments you get just don’t go away And say- your wife gets mad cause you’re always on the road I’m already on the road, I do shows, you do shows! I was told that entertainment is all the same It’s a, different court but we playing same game) I wanna slam fools on the mat Wanna suplex, cats give em Belly to Backs Rock Bottom, Tombstone and sunset flip So I need you to teach me that I wanna slam fools on the mat Hear the crowd go wild when I win the strap Moonsault, Sharpshooter and a F5 too So I need you to teach me that Creed….. I wanna learn how to run the ropes, do flat back Bumps Throw lines, and perfect a sick working punch Who told you these terms? I got em from the Internet And if you don’t mind, I wasn’t quite finish yet Dropkick, drop toe hold, and scoop slam A little Sweet chin music, tuning up the band Big Boots, Head locks and Samoan drops Chokeslam full Nelsons Indian death locks Fujiwara arm bars, coquina clutches Make me the baddest I wanna be the toughest!! Stretch me out, I wanna see what I can take, and make it look real even though we know it’s F—- DONT YOU ever fix you lips to SAY THAT WORD Ok but you gotta show me how to make it not hurt Man I can’t do this, I just came to play a game And my friend has gone completely insane So I’m gonna just leave… you’re just gonna leave? I wouldn’t ever desert you in your time of need But one more thing.. I got you a gift, Golden girls dvd season 3! Yeah you like that Yeah. I just might If you want it, you gotta teach me to fight Ok one lesson and then we gotta stop! Okay what’s the first thing Taking a chair shot haha
LINGO 02:24
The Lingo A good guy’s the baby face and the villain is the heel And if I smartened you up that means you know the deal When you shooting that means keeping it real with no script The match is a dance, the mic is the stick when you hit the mat is a Bump, A mark is a chump, you over, you do anything you want The story is an angle, the dress the gimmick Keeping Kayfabe is pretending that you live it 5 Star match means not much can top it If you messed a move up, then that means you botched it Color means blood, an X means help Showing off is going into business for yourself When its real its a shoot - and you telling you telling the truth When you over, the crowd loves everything you do The house is the number of fans that showed up If you get tired in the ring, that means you blown up If you’re a draw that means you got fans If you a shooter than means you got hands You get the push, then that means they got plans Opposite of that is a burial, understand? Heat is any response from the crowd whether boo or cheer, it don’t matter if it’s loud If you got the book you;’re the leader The big guy is the heater when you neither good nor bad that makes you a Tweener The booker is the boss A short one is a squash A match ending in chaos is called a schmozz When you gotta take that L it’s called do a job and when the crowd gets loud, they call that a pop a Dark match means no shine and if I;m giving you the rub that’s referring to a cosign Now you know all the wrestling terms Which is cool., but Ill give ya one more lesson to learn Whether you watch it, as a fan or in the closet > Enjoy the Product, watch em and Astonish. It’s okay to acknowledge but, do yourself a solid Never use these in front of wrestlers, you got it? Hope that helped, send this song to a friend, With the pin for the win Curtain call thats that end,
Tactical gear, looking like I’m bout to go war with cops, Samoan drops, Neighbors Hear the ruckus for blocks Piledriver, shatter your insides, Suspend you from an incline with some zip ties And beat you with whatever I can find Pay off any fine, You swore I Froze time, when you feel these clotheslines Yeah Me and my brother heavy gunners Make you roll like the Rock whenever he catch a Stunner We In ya face and we ain’t coming off the top rope You rappers are not dope You might be Beyond hope The winner is…. they calling my name The rawest up in the game, the authors of pain We don’t wanna maintain the order We just came to slaughter We don’t want the titles the fame and fortune We are the authors of pain and torture Once Again We don’t wanna maintain the order We just came to slaughter We don’t want the titles the fame and fortune We are the authors of pain and torture We make other rappers retire here They flee the ring from the ski masks and riot gear This primal fear, we the new era’s pioneers Dangerous like trying to take food out a lion’s beard Me and Ran run the gauntlet for conflict My accomplice, power bomb send em to God quick We taking straps off these newcomers Been on top for two summers, your crew suffer We the brutes in black boots ready for wartime These new top teams get crushed like pork rinds Tell paul bearer we ready to fill coffins When it come to bringing pain, we the authors We don’t wanna maintain the order We just came to slaughter We don’t want the titles the fame and fortune We are the authors of pain and torture
Yo, I watched a dude get thrown off a cage And come back and wrestle the very next day True story I saw a man unleash a 6 foot snake That bit another man’s arm, yet they call the fake True story I watched a man not speak for a year Rappel from the ceiling, without an ounce of fear With his face painted up, and a bat in his hand So how can one wonder how could attract a fan I watched a dude pretend to be a dead man Another crashed a hospital, smacked a cat with a bedpan Ridiculous? Perhaps, but tell me what could Possibly be more entertaining than that? I know on any given night I can see something incredible Moves prompting “ooh’s” and moments so unforgettable So in case you didn’t know I gotta let you know Whatever you like, I bet you this is better yo HOOK Explosions, car crashes, every night Drama, excitement, grown men in tights Love triangles, stunts and fist fights Wrestling is better than whatever you like Yeah said it. It’s better than whatever you like I said it’s better than whatever you like 2X Immma bet it it’s better than whatever you like V2 A woman gave birth to a hand An actor named David arquette was the champ… You had to be there, you wouldnt understand. Wait i was there, and I still don’t understand Yo there’s Barbed wire, tables set on fire No insurance though most of my heroes can’t retire It’s complicated so violent and self abusive, And independent contractors are somehow exclusive We know too much I can’t pretend I don’t But the fact is they employ some of my favorite folks Amazing feats on the regular I think that it’s dope And maybe one day it’ll change at the top we can hope And everytime i think I can’t watch it any longer Something happens that only makes my fandom get stronger Yup Best bang for the buck 9:00 turn it up Man y’all know what’s up Come on
Wrestling is real People are fake Cause when you eating they peeping your plate Sittin in the cut to see your mistakes Prey on your weakness to keep you at bay Wrestling and music it’s seeming the same > I’m just playing my part tryna keep out the way They call me a leader, cause I was a teacher But nowadays I ain’t got nothing to say I follow my own code brother It’s a lone road brother Put ya on your backside like a Stone cold stunner Hell yeah Mega Ran wins LOL They ain’t even surprised anymore and I can tell Got no heat but if I did then it’d be white hot Critically acclaimed off the chain that’s a mic drop Cause when you limitless they’ll always try to limit you None could walk a mile in my 15 tennis shoe Billy Graham on go fund me Barry windham on go fundme All the entertainment they done brought us How they wind up with no money I was up in college hungry My meal plan depleted> Still somehow scraped up the funding pay per views on Sunday Kinda funny, like, Greg, Nick Tim and Blessing How you constantly progressing and they ask the same questions like How long you gone do this? Man ain’t no telling Hurtin like hell but on camera no selling I’m back like Bray Wyatt due to fervent demand I show love tho very few cats deserving of ran Cuz For the culture is what they be yelling But ask for a dollar the result is telling We’ll try to pay you just wait till it’s over Now I’m playing hide and seek with the promoter Hot dog and a handshake Pop off for the fan base Traveling across the landscape Some use drugs as the band aid I was good if the fam ate Keeping my needs secondary Every week I was getting buried Now It’s clear that I’m legendary Who Let the friendship spoil like it’s out of the season Who Need my locale , holler I’ll gladly drop em A beacon I making beats now so I try to use logic and reason But When people show you who they are you gotta believe em I keep an Arizona addy but my hearts in Philly Check my circle and you finding only bosses nar me Anybody know I keep a plug across the city Cause Ain’t tryna lose the case like Austin Theory Feel me
Grab your spray bottles! And let’s get ready to do it for the content! Here we go Mega Ran Brian Zane Dick Kick City, It gets gritty when mega ran, come through, the kid gets busy Work yourself into a shoot, But you know it’s legit "Like what you like, just don't be a dick" Hey (Wrestling With Wregret let’s get it!) Win loss or draw, The kid gloves is off Mask on like Big Hoss Mcgraw The Influencer, Zane ain’t kidding Chef, Cooking it up in the Kayfabe Kitchen (Wrestling With Wregret let’s get it!) Yo what’s that scent? Maybeyou should bottle it Drink it in, Spray it on then get Claude to model it 8 years in can’t look back Who else can make velour sweatsuits look wack GAAAAAH! (Wrestling With Wregret let’s get it!) No Nonsense, a wrestling godsend You just hatin’ like Old Man Tronson Listen You have never been a threat You are messin with the best when we wrestle with Regret Hey (Wrestling With Wregret let’s get it!)


Mega Ran returns to the ring with this eclectic collection of tracks showcasing his love for professional wrestling.


released March 27, 2023

All songs produced by Mega Ran except
SuperKicks produced by Lost Perception
LINGO produced by LR Beats
Goodbye to the Bad Guy produced by G1


all rights reserved



Mega Ran Phoenix, Arizona

“Mega Ran's proven he can excel in storytelling, punchlines, poignancy, freestyling and, well, pretty much any other way you can measure an MC.”

— LA Weekly

An incredible impromptu "freestyle" MC, Ran's unique combination of fantasy and introspective hip-hop has found its way all over the world, into leading press outlets and most recently, into the Guinness Book Of World Records.
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