INTRO: Bartleby! Herman Melville! What a winning combo. Chyeah!

VERSE 1: (LARS)

One day I placed an ad for a systems engineer
He showed up in a Toasters shirt, with AirPods in his ears
He was fluent in Java, Python, PHP,
I told him he was hired, his name Bartleby
His workflow was incredible, 10 sessions on his screen
Fingers flying I was crying ‘cause I’d built the perfect team
Only wish I’d met him earlier, it’s really not that funny
How an office space in Sunnyvale can burn that VC
I said Bartleby, will you do this simple task?
Update your iOS and see if it will run our app? And he said!

CHORUS:

No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.

VERSE 2: (Mega Ran)

In the morning Mr. Turkey’s steady coding like a pro
Pumping data, without failure, but starts to slow down later
And Nipper’s got a tummy ache from last night’s dinner
And starts to get distracted, won’t put down the fidget spinner
So questions arising over cryptic algorithms
To solve the dispute, they seek Bartleby’s opinion
We’re setting up ecommerce please input the database
But the office astonished when they heard Bartleby say…

CHORUS:

No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.

LARS: Hey Turkey! I know you're named after a flightless bird, but I heard you've been working on your scales.

(Trombone solo)

Can someone please explain why...

VERSE 3:

LARS: Bartleby won’t leave his office, staring at the brick wall
Twenty-seven empty Red Bulls on his desk, but that’s not all

MEGA RAN: If he doesn’t leave, we’ll probably have to relocate
He just won’t obey, so he’s got no case

LARS: So the cops took him to prison,
and San Quentin's where he sat
In a cell in San Rafael, I guess he should of ran that app

MEGA RAN: A scuffle breaks out in the yard,
Guards telling him you got to
Return to your cell — but he preferred not to

CHORUS:

No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.
No! I'd prefer not to.